As I’ve watched the fevered debate over extending marriage benefits to gay couples, gun control, as well as a number of other issues, I can’t help but wonder what many people hope to accomplish by their fervor.
I’ve often found that when people are quick to stake a claim on a particular cause or position, they are equally slow in their willingness to shift or change their position.
The nature of humans is such that once we publicly commit to an ideology, we are very unlikely to shift our positions or views to consider new evidence or opinions. And once entrenched in a point of view, most folks get angry towards everyone who does not share their position on the matter.
The challenge is that there is seldom one absolute, perfect solution. There are nuances to all controversial matters, whether they are subjects as diverse as gay rights, fracking, gun control, universal health care, organic vs. conventional food systems, etc.
By keeping an open mind for discussion and debate, we have a better chance of understanding the nuances that lead to better possibilities rather than limiting the options to a “victory” for one side and a desire for vindication from the other.
Have you ever been persuaded by someone who was angry and dogmatic? By friends attempting to stuff their points of view down your throat? Did it change your mind or your emotions?
If you, a reasonable person, were not moved to greater understanding of an opposing view by an angry outside argument, what makes you think anyone else would be either?
When I see people changing their profile pictures on social media to represent their side of an issue or otherwise taking a stand for a particular cause, it prompts me to question their motive. Are they really trying to affect a change they believe in — or are they simply trying to say to the people in their peer group that “I’m one of you, too!”
Since most people connect on social media with people who share their homogeneous beliefs, it really doesn’t impact change. It simply shouts “Me too!”
Courage is displayed and change achieved less by shouting one’s dogma (It’s usually ‘their’ dogma and ‘our’ truth…) and more by gently asking questions which lead to our own growth and understanding.
What we need are leaders who have the ability and courage to take a stand based on core values — but a willingness to modify those beliefs as new understanding emerges. I realize that it’s human nature to demonize “them” as a means of solidifying “us.” But we don’t show boldness when we run from the things we fear. Courage comes from questioning why we’re angry and facing the fear that caused the rage to surface.
Charles