You’ve probably heard the old saw – the second happiest day of a boat owner’s life is the day he buys it. The happiest day is when he sells it.
A number of years ago, my brother wanted to buy a boat. He asked everyone around him – including our dad – for advice on whether he should or should not go into debt to make this purchase. Everyone he asked, with the exception of the salesman he bought his boat from, counseled him to stay away from a boat, especially if it required taking on debt. Ostensibly, he was looking for objective counsel about a decision he was trying to make. But since the deal was already decided in his head, he was actually just looking for someone to agree with his rationale and help justify the purchase.
I made a similar mistake many years ago when I decided to spend about $50,000 of borrowed money on a direct mail postcard campaign in an attempt to get more national assignment work. I ran the numbers and justified the expense. I then asked a few select people – including Linda – for their thoughts on my reasoning. When all of them counseled against that load of debt for advertising, I further reasoned that they were motivated by fear and just trying to hold me back.
Although the increased exposure did eventually bring in enough work to cover most of the expense, it was not nearly worth the pain of covering the debt and the interest charges that mounted for several years. It was a foolish decision that cost us dearly. Nobody – especially Linda – was trying to hold me back. Everyone wanted what was best for us. But I was too arrogant to really listen. I wanted agreement.
I heard many years ago that an education is an expensive process, regardless of how the tuition is paid. And the cost can come in the form of one’s time and money.
Life is not long enough for any of us to gain all the wisdom we need by ourselves. We need to learn and have some of our education paid for by other people’s experiences. If someone else has already paid for and learned a particular lesson, wouldn’t it behoove us to listen and learn from them?
Of course, one always runs the risk of having counsel given out of someone else’s fear. If we choose to listen to people who live their lives with a scarcity or fear-based mentality, we will never try anything risky or daring. The trick is to select a set of advisers who have wisdom born out of failure but who’ve also picked themselves up and tried again until their passions succeeded.
I’m not sure if the day my brother sold his boat was his happiest. But I can’t express the sense of relief I had the day we paid off the debt of my advertising campaign. I may have gotten work from it, but it wasn’t worth the anguish. I learned a big lesson. When I ask for advice now, I listen. And when someone agrees with me too quickly on a big decision, I’m more inclined to question that person’s reasoning. Heck, I’m the one paying the tuition bill.
Charles