“In your zeal to persuade, you will stifle the voice of the other side. Misusing art to preach, your story will become a thinly discussed sermon as you strive in a single stroke to convert the world. – Robert McKee in “Story.
I believe the raw emotional desire of many people to be a part of something bigger than themselves overshadows their effectiveness in having a significant impact on things that have meaning to them.
The issue of same-sex marriage is one that is already polarizing and will only become more so. An interesting point to me is the number of people I know who don’t have a dog in the fight, per say — they’re in a heterosexual marriage with minimal contact with homosexuals — but see the debate as an issue of justice and have decided to take a stand.
I know equally committed people who believe that the sanctity of one man/one woman is the only foundation of marriage. Their concern is not only for loosening the definition of marriage. Many people believe that increasing tolerance for homosexuality also allows increasing acceptance of multiple-spouse marriages, sexual relationships between adults and children, and bestiality.
As I listen to many people present their reasoning for their point of view, not only do they believe their side is right, but they are so entrenched and immovable that no common ground can be established or tolerated. The image in my mind is from WWI battlefield scenes in which the enemies are dug in for the long fight. The ground between them is a no-man’s land strewn with barbed wire and casualties of battle.
I am strongly opinionated and have jumped into far more fights than I care to remember. Several have been life-altering and broken close friendships which have never healed. Looking back on the battles, a few of my views have not changed much. But the a majority of them have. If I were in politics, you would definitely call me a “flip flopper.” I call it growth. Maturity. Wisdom.
Using story is more effective in changing others' points of view than being more dogmatic about your own.
Time and experience have a way of filing off the sharp points. They may not alter the core make-up of our being, but like water constantly flowing over granite, we smooth out little by little over time.
Intransigence has its value. There are absolutes we should be willing to be bound by.
My issue is not with the inherent truths we believe. My concern is whether I am, and you are, actually making an impact or just making noise. Use your power to create useful electricity, not more static.
Whether two sides are firing mortars or insults, neither is affecting the change they want to see. When each side’s primary dogma is to undermine the enemy’s dogma, very little gets accomplished.
I deeply believe the human heart is called to be out of itself, to a purpose far bigger and more expansive than it can achieve on its own. To reach that purpose, it must develop the capacity to listen.
Blasting someone with your “facts” and your opinion won’t change their views. The only way to affect others’ views is to change the way they see themselves in their larger stories. To do that, you need to understand where they fit in their own story.
You have a decision to make. Do you want to continue with your emotional screed or do you want to be effective, to have an impact on changing the story? You can’t do both.
Charles
Tagged as:
Attitude,
Emotions,
Listening,
Story,
Writing
My mind is on the creative process a lot as I move through my day. As an artist, I am constantly battling with where to allocate the time for creative thinking, planning and the execution of my projects.
There are a number of titles that I’ve heard for the small business owner, including owner-operator or solopreneur. The title I’ve given myself is artist-operator because, even though I am an artist first, it’s the process of operations and sales that moves a business forward and gives a hope of being profitable. The corollary is that the operation of a business can easily overwhelm the time and space for creative work to be conceived and brought to life.
I talk with a number of creative people on a regular basis who are, in various ways, waiting for the creative “muse” to arrive and create that space in time for them, or they expect the “muse” to meet them on their journey and inspire them to produce.
I have found that the “muse” doesn’t sit and wait. Nor does it come to find us. The “muse” must be sought.
Even knowing this, I found myself grumbling recently about a self-directed project that had stalled because I was spending so much time and thought on the operations and sales processes. And then the “muse” spoke. It said, “Shut-up with the talking and come find me.” The moment I started working on the “doing” of the project rather than the “talking” about the work, the muse met me and the project was completed within days.
Julia Cameron, in her book “The Artist’s Way,” talks about the need to show up at the page. Good writing doesn’t get written unless the writer shows up at the page and writes anymore than a structure gets built without the builder showing up and building.
Are you showing up to do your work or waiting for the “muse” to find you and bring the work along?
Charles
Tagged as:
Attitude,
Creative Muse,
Creativity,
Emotions,
Thinking,
Writing
After nearly two months of waiting to get done what I thought would be completed in two weeks, my new blog site is up and ready for posts. Because I expected the switch to take so little time, I quit posting so that the transfer of old posts would not be more complicated. Well… that didn’t go so smoothly and I fell out of the habit of posting.
Why is it that bad habits are so easy to pick up and even the best of habits, those we claim to hold dear to our hearts, are so easy to drop?
If my understanding is correct, the word “habit” comes from the Latin habitus - to have and is related to inhabitare – to dwell. I like understanding a word in way that makes it visual to me.
So, a “habit” is something I put on or dwell within on a regular basis. For good or bad, our habits are where we live and what others see us wearing as part of how we treat ourselves and them.
Much like daily journaling, I enjoy blogging. If I go a couple of days and haven’t posted, I get irritable and anxious. In much the same way I do when I miss exercise or my concentrated reading time. But I’ve also found that the more I miss doing something I love, the easier it is to keep not doing it. Even if I love it.
So in much the same way I swim for my well-being, I write. Although I love to know that something I post resonates with you, I know that I write for my heart and hope that the connection it may make with you will allow for a conversation that helps us both grow deeper.
So after two months of not living in my blog habit, it feels good to put it back on.
Charles
Tagged as:
Attitude,
Habits,
Writing
I met Bob a few years ago at the YMCA and started getting to know him better during brief exchanges while we were working out. I was always impressed by his positive outlook during each encounter. Since I am usually interested in the disciplines that writers apply to their work, I always enjoyed asking Bob about how his novel was unfolding. I was most impressed by the daily commitment that he made to move the process forward. It’s that commitment to continue with our objectives in the face of apathy that we all can benefit from making. Whether it’s writing a novel or looking for a new job, the daily steps we take are most important.
What do you think? How are you moving ahead with the apathy you encounter?
Charles
http://www.charlesguptonphoto.com
On Twitter @ http://twitter.com/CharlesGupton
Bob McCarthy
As a novelist, my hope is tied to a belief that through a pursuit of excellence, I can achieve successful publication of my work. So far, all I’ve received are rejection slips or worse, no response at all! At times, I’m uncertain as to where to turn or what the next step is. But every day I continue to write, believing that consistent attention to my craft and constantly producing new material will, in time, lead to publication.
When I retired as a clinical psychologist, I dedicated myself to a second career as a writer. I’d already been writing for 35 years; I didn’t wait until the day after to begin. With this new direction, however, I went from a settled life into a wilderness of sorts, often feeling lost. I’m attempting to develop new skills – mastering the computer, learning to distinguish trustworthy criticism, developing a professional and social network – while continuing to write. To pursue this goal in my mid-60’s added a dimension of doubt relative to limited time – not just time left but time left with a mind intact enough to write well.
Hope is more than a wish, more than a feeling disconnected from effort. I view hope as moored in part to a belief in self, in part to a faith in the world. The view grants me a sense of honesty in the way I hope as opposed to a gambling desperation.
Hope is not passive. It’s not something I wait for like the arrival of sleep. It is entwined with an active pursuit of my goal when there is no guarantee of achieving it.
My challenge is to treat hope well, to be ready to let it in when it offers itself like light through blinds, not wasting my time begging it to come to me. I have to fight vigorously at times to keep hope at my side. At other times, I have to understand that I am on my own, pursuing my goal in somber tints, trusting that hope will return. I have to set my “dials” daily on remaining hopeful so that I’m open to hope when it honors me with another visit. Present or not, hope is an option, on occasion a choice overlooked. The choosing to be hopeful keeps me prepared to do whatever I can to sustain the journey.
My hope moves in wave-like motions, my confidence, at times, a function of the waves. Nonetheless, the commitment is for the duration. Success or not, I will continue to write. That is my hope. ~ Bob McCarthy
Tagged as:
Attitude,
Economy,
Hope,
Not Without Hope,
Photography,
Portraits,
Writing
